sQueeshy’s 1st Day at Work

“They laughed at me when I started my online business. When I show them my profit, they started asking me to coach them.” This is the headline of the flyer I gave out, sounds cliché. Adam Khoo, trying out his new stunts again, gives an online course about internet marketing. In actual fact, he’s trying to expand his database. Smart ASS…

“They gave me that look when I said I’m distributing flyers. When I told them my pay, they asked if I’ve got anymore lobang.” -Ngiam ’05- You bunch of NIGGARS! <--- highlight the last word to see. Haha.

I’ve learnt quite some stuff today. Tips on printing flyers, ways to distribute flyers and most importantly, to “GENG”.

Was allocated to City Hall, outside Starbucks, towards Raffles City. Guess what…? I got shoo-ed off after 4mins 37 seconds. When I turn back to collect my remaining 1.8k pieces of flyer, guess what…? Some bastard took my TODAY. Daring piece of shit, don’t let me find out who you are. Now to the other city hall exit, the Peninsula exit.

In front of me were these three other beings giving out flyers. They speak ultra profound Chinese. Chim. Damn CHIM, cause I can’t comprehend what in the world they were talking about. Being the usual kind soul, I stood behind them, a few meters further from the front line, the EXIT OF THE MRT STATION. They were giving out some nonsense advertisement, as if mine’s not. Yah, but… the printing seems to matter a lot.

Some didn’t bother to take those from THOSE CHINESE in front, but they took mine after a glance at it. Red bold fonts on yellow paper with a catchy headline. Not bad huh… The crowd came before ten, working adults. After that, HELL. The countdown for lunch was as if 10hr14min43s?

I met people from all walks of life. Let’s see… Malays are they nicest. Think they took most of my 1.1k distributed. Not trying to be sexist, ladies are better. Some guys are quite… farked up. Flyers, if it’s me, I wouldn’t bother too. Here’s some of their reactions when I step up.

Take,

and say, “thank you.”
smile. =)
stare into the flyer.
after having 3 other flyers from THOSE CHINESE.
and say, “so many? Why don’t u all gimme cash?”
stack with those from THOSE CHINESE, throw.
didn’t even peek, walk off.

Didn’t take,

And say, “thank you.”
Hands up, and say, “thank you.”
Hands up.
Pretend to talk into their cellphone.
Look straight, walk.
And say, “have already.” (my balls)
And say, “sorry”
And say, “I’ve got a lot already.” With those 3 pieces in their hands from THOSE CHINESE.

Some are nice, some are not. Good apples, rotten apples.

My last hour was the slowest. Damn slow man, worse than a punctured car. NO LINK. Yah. 1.45, I took out another 8 pieces. “I shall leave after this.” That 8 pieces went out fast. 1.48, I left the platoon of flyer distributors. Bah…

“oh, forgot to tell ya pple jus now, report back to office when u’re done. See ya at 1430. =)” I got this message on the train. It’s only 1355. I called my friend, and he’s on his way back too. So, WHO CARES? Haha. We reached office at 1415 after some slow walk from mrt station to Keppel towers.

TIRED~!

Rogerout,
sQueeshy